That's Life

I make assumptions all the time.

I don’t think I do. I don’t try to. In fact, I often congratulate myself on not making assumptions. 

But I do it all the time.

That’s life. 

It’s only when I slow down and get curious that I realize I’ve made an assumption. Asking a clarifying question always helps:

• “What you mean when you say _ ?”

And then I have to repeat these words in my head: Stop talking. Don’t add a "because". Don’t add an “I” statement. Let the silence allow the other person the space to clarify what they meant. 

It’s often a gift to both of us.

PS. When I'm coaching, I’m really good about not making assumptions because that’s the work - getting myself out of the way so the other person can hear themselves. But when I’m out in the world, my own reactions kick in and cloud my vision. And that's why I coach - it keeps me in the practice.